


Crystal clear hearts, what can you see?

by Solrey



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Awkward Romance, Best Friends, Canon Compliant, Crying, Denial of Feelings, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Romance, Falling In Love, Fear of Discovery, Feelings Realization, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Happy Ending, Hugs, I Tried, Idiots in Love, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Oblivious, Secret Crush, Seonghwa is a saint, Sexual Humor, Slightly - Freeform, Swearing, Unrequited Love, give him a cookie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:27:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26183422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Solrey/pseuds/Solrey
Summary: The night after their first win, Yeosang couldn't sleep on his top bunk bed, staring at the ceiling while adrenaline was still throbbing through his veins. The blood rushing through his ears was so loud yet so calming. And he knew normally it should be their first win which was one his mind but in this moment, were he was staring at the ceiling, was something entirely different on his mind-Yeosang was in love.In love with his best friend.In love with the literal sunshine of his life.He was in love with Wooyoung, and he had only noticed it now.
Relationships: Jung Wooyoung/Kang Yeosang
Comments: 4
Kudos: 128





	Crystal clear hearts, what can you see?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello~ 
> 
> This.. came to me through a prompt I made but the og prompt didn't really make the cut into this version. Well, Woosang still happened. 
> 
> This is honestly just painful obliviousness and pining and idk, it hurts somehow. Rated teen because of sexual humor and usage of a few swear words. 
> 
> That being said, this is my first try to really write something canon compliant so I hope it's okay. :)

A light was suddenly turned on in their usual dark room and a voice echoes back within the walls, making Yeosang wince lightly.

"I know you two stayed up late playing video games but it's 1pm, you should get up now." Seonghwa’s motherly voice soothed over the two boys tangled up in the same bed. Yeosang only raises his hand once to indicate he had understood before he hears the elder sigh and shuffle out of their room, leaving behind quietness. 

Yeosang doesn’t get up before 1:30, drifting in and out of sleep, body so comfortable with another hot body so close. Wooyoung was sprawled on his back with Yeosang's head on his chest, face deeply buried into the shirt, feeling the ribcage move beneath him at every slow breath the younger took. It was peaceful and Yeosang liked that. The feeling of having an arm thrown around his waist while their legs were tangled together and Wooyoung’s face pressed into the crown of his head- Yeosang felt content like this. It was the way he wanted to wake up each and every day, even though he knew that wasn't possible, especially during promotion times.

He only lifts his heavy head when he feels Wooyoung press a soft kiss against his head which made Yeosang melt all the more into a puddle, chasing the warmth he had gotten to know over the span of 5 years now. Groaned nonetheless when he felt Wooyoung beginning to move under him. Reluctantly and with a pout does Yeosang sit up in Wooyoung’s bed, the blanket sliding down his back, pooling around his hip. 

For a moment the both of them stare at each other like they had done so many times before, looking into eyes they knew were richer than anything in the universe before Wooyoung whined slightly. Yeosang’s eyes snapped down, seeing something very  _ prominent  _ waking up too and flushed a deep red, eyes averting immediately. 

The silence is thick for a fraction of a second before they both giggle, Wooyoung also sitting up and ruffling Yeosang’s hair. 

"Wait for me? We can go eat chicken when I'm done." 

"Sure but be quick." Yeosang huffs out, the heat on his cheeks not leaving. He swears he can see Wooyoung look at him with adoration before the younger laughs, smirking when he is done and coming way too close to his face, a hand playing with his brown hair. 

"Gonna think about you then~" Wooyoung says teasingly while slipping down his bed, walking over and out of their room to take care of his little problem.

Yeosang watches him go, eyes glued to the place his best friend had disappeared. Blushing furiously at the implication his best friend had just made, hiding his face behind his hands. He gulped down his need to know if he was  _ actually  _ thinking about him while taking care of his problem and instead falls back into the still warm mattress, savouring the left over heat of their bodies and buries his nose deep into the sheets. Unconsciously does he sniff, Wooyoung’s scent filling his nose and mind, and he sighs content, closing his eyes because with all of those impressions around him, could he pretend the younger was still with him.

He still lies deeply buried into Wooyoung’s bed when he hears the soft sound of footsteps echoing back and a shadow looming over his face. Yeosang glances at the younger, seeing him smirk down at him before he sits down  _ on  _ Yeosang, better said on his butt. 

"Get off you wet lump." Yeosang groans, face once again buried into the sheets beneath which sadly only worsened the whole situation. He really didn't need the image of Wooyoung half naked sitting on his butt, he surely didn't. Yet, his best friend bounces on his body like it’s nothing, his hyena laugh filling the room. Yeosang’s heart swells at the sound. 

"Get off of me." Yeosang whined, squirming until Wooyoung not so elegantly sliding down his ass and placing a hand on Yeosang's hand. The touch is too hot, burning him so greatly even though there was no reason to. 

"Alright grumpy cat, let's get ready."

Following the younger with his eyes hadn’t been the best call when Yeosang sees how Wooyoung changes into clothes not far from him, his muscular back on display and Yeosang has to suppress a groan at the sight, battling the heat pooling on his stomach. Denying the flutter inside of his chest.

Little did he know that this was the first time he ever saw Wooyoung as more than just a friend- even though at the exact moment he didn't recognize his changing feelings. 

\-------

They won. Yeosang can’t believe it, grasp it even when the MC's announce that Ateez had won with Wave, that their and atinys hard work had paid off. So, he let his tears run freely when he walked behind his members to find the person he needed the most in this moment- Wooyoung. 

He took the younger in his arms, laid his head on his back and cried while Wooyoung himself was crying, and so was the rest of Ateez. They had won as a group, they had won because they deserved it. 

Deep down all Yeosang could think about in this moment was the promise he and Wooyoung had made when they still had been in BigHit together. 

Debut together.

Stand on stages together.

And even after Yeosang had left, Wooyoung wanted to keep the promise not on different teams but in the same. Had come after him because he rather failed with Yeosang than alone, and succeeded only when Yeosang was with him. 

The whole thing had Yeosang crying more and more. It felt like a dream and it was- a dream finally coming true, and with the people he most treasured.

  
  


The night after their first win, Yeosang couldn't sleep on his top bunk bed, staring at the ceiling while adrenaline was still throbbing through his veins. The blood rushing through his ears was so loud yet so calming. And he knew normally it should be their first win which was one his mind but in this moment, were he was staring at the ceiling, was something entirely different on his mind-

Yeosang was in love.

In love with his best friend.

In love with the literal sunshine of his life.

He was in love with Wooyoung, and he had only noticed it now.

Noticed it when his mind finally caught up to them winning- and that Wooyoung had been with him, through thick and thin at his side, never wavering in his resolve to stick with Yeosang. 

That seeing Wooyoung crying on stage and hugging him had moved something inside of Yeosang he had never known that he had. Yet, it was there, so loud in his head that it overpowered every happiness he felt because of their win. 

Because he was in love with his best friend. 

A man in an idol group- not a friend, not a staff member, not a fan- but the person who knew him best. 

The one who was sleeping soundly on the bottom bed after he had used all his energy to celebrate just hours ago. 

The one whose eyes shine the brightest when laughing, accompanied by a voice so high you feel it in every fiber of your body, a laugh so contagious you have to laugh with him.

A person he loved to spend time with, even if they just laid next to each other for hours on end. When they let their heads rest on each other’s shoulders and silently play with the other’s hand, sometimes whispering silent promises both knew but never spoke about out loud. Those cuddles they shared under a blanket when both of them were utterly exhausted by their promotion schedule. 

The person who pressed kisses on his face to show his affection.

And suddenly all of those actions looked so different to Yeosang, awoken a whole new perspective in him. Because his touches, his words, his actions held now a different meaning, weren’t entirely platonic anymore, and Yeosang hated that.

In the depth of the night he curled up into himself, letting tears run down his face because he couldn’t possibly grasp the weight now on his shoulders, the pain he would go through. Yeosang was scared of the next day, and the day after that one. 

Yeosang cried himself to sleep while tearing himself apart on the inside.

\-----

He was in denial, Yeosang knew that. It wasn’t exactly hard to guess when he told himself that all of his feelings were strictly  _ platonic  _ and had never been romantic. Yeosang knows that telling himself such lies was hurting him more in the end than helping him. Yet, he couldn’t stop trying to convince himself of those lies to be the truth. 

It was hurting him, and Seonghwa had noticed it. Not Wooyoung but  _ Seonghwa _ . And it took just a sentence to break Yeosang and show him that his denial wasn’t bringing him anywhere. 

“Talk to me Yeosang, I know that you have been bottling up. Let hyung help you?” 

Seonghwa always knew what Yeosang needed to hear, what words would crack his hard shell. Yeosang wasn’t his hyung’s  _ secret _ favourite for nothing. Without thinking twice about it does Yeosang fall into Seonghwa’s embrace, burying his face into the crook of neck, letting a few stray tears fall down his cheeks- 

The elder hums in comfort and caresses his back, staying silent while Yeosang can’t seem to hold in any longer, the emotions he had kept in breaking out.

"I love Wooyoung." 

Yeosang whispers. He feels Seonghwa tensing for a hot second before the elder hugs him even tighter making him whimper in confusion. 

"Seongh-"

"That’s okay, Yeosangie, there is nothing wrong with loving someone."

And he knows that  _ technically  _ that is the truth. Being in love with someone is never a bad thing just as it is. But this? This particular love he had now? It wasn't okay.

"He is my best friend-"

"People tend to fall for their best friends."

"Wooyoung is a guy-"

"Being in love with a guy is pretty normal nowadays Yeosangie, just not exactly the biggest topic here."

"But he is an idol from our own group!" Yeosang presses his face deeper into Seonghwa’s shoulder. "If anyone would find out about it- it could end our career! Everything we worked so hard for!"

"Then don't let anyone see or tell everyone outright and proudly about it." Seonghwa hums into his hair. "You know that we stand behind you Yeosang, no matter what you do- you will forever be part of our family. Love or not."

Yeosang keeps on crying, trying to hold in the tears and the choking sobs, clawing his hyung’s shirt just a little tighter. 

Because how could Seonghwa be so understanding? So  _ not _ shocked with his confession? Any other person would have been in denial, trying to talk him out of his own feelings yet Seonghwa only helf tighter onto Yeosang as if he was afraid the younger would slip out of his grasp.

Wouldn't it be normal for Seonghwa to tell him that their career as idols had to be their priority? Just that Seonghws didn't do that. Instead Yeosang could feel his hyung’s hands hold onto him, grounding him like they had done so many times before. 

And while he sat almost in Seonghwa’s lap, trying to grasp the world, did he hear a door opening and cursed himself for not locking the door to his room earlier. Seonghwa seemed all too relaxed because the elder says nothing for a moment before he speaks up.

"Could you leave for now?" Seonghws voice was gentle which only robbed another small sob from him. 

"What's wrong with-" 

"Nothing, don't worry."

Yeosang almost breaks down more when he hears Wooyoung’s with worry laced voice, feeling the itch under his skin to just turn around and confess, to get those painful feelings off of his chest- but he couldn’t, fingers only digging deeper into the shirt he held onto.

"Hyung he is my best friend!" Wooyoung whines a little, thankfully not too loud. "Maybe I know what's wrong!" 

"Hardly, Wooyoung, hardly. Just give him space for now, okay?"

Yeosang hears a shuffle behind him before a hand lands on his back and he jerks surprise, knowing exactly who's palm this is.

"I'm here for you if you need me, Sangie. If you want to tell me you can, okay? I just- I go for now."

He hears the worry in his best friend's voice, knows that he would also be worried if their situations would be swapped, worrying immensely but Yeosang was glad that in this specific moment Wooyoung wasn’t trying to press the matter. Because what could he tell him? 

_ I'm sorry I'm in love with you please don't hate me? _

No, he couldn't say that. So, he let out a relieved sigh when the door closed again and Seonghwa quietly talked to him, trying to help him come to terms with his feelings. 

  
  


Yeosang didn't tell Wooyoung the reason he had cried, and he knew that his best friend was both worried and sad at his lack of apparent trust within their friendship. Which wasn’t the case at all. He trusted Wooyoung with every ounce of his being- but he treasured their friendship more than the love he probably wouldn't get when he confessed and came clean.

It pained him to see that Wooyoung itched to ask, to know why he had cried so bitterly in Seonghwa’s arms. He didn’t ask. Wooyoung accepted the boundaries Yeosang pulled up and not overstepped them. 

For now, Yeosang was glad that it was this way.

\----

  
  


Wonderland promotions went on smoothly, and even though they didn't win again, all of them could see the growth they had over the year.

Yeosang still harbored feelings for Wooyoung. Strongly. 

Sometimes, just breathing the same air or sleeping in the same room was hard. Wooyoung hadn't noticed his feelings yet, or so he hoped. During their promotions and the time after, Yeosang put more distance between himself and the course of his hurting feelings.  _ That _ was something Wooyoung noticed. Yeosang saw that with every single word answer he gave Wooyoung and with every shrug of his shoulders at a question, the light in his best friend's eyes dimmed a little.

It hurt. Seeing Wooyoung hurt.

But the other wasn't making it particularly easy for him- they way he was clinging to San nowadays, never really far away from the sunshine of their group and Wooyoung's literal soulmate. And even though he knew their feelings were probably entirely platonic and that just two over touchy people had found each other- it still made his heart squeeze in an uncomfortable way.

Yeosang wasn't jealous, or at least he wouldn't call it jealousy. He had nothing against the way his members were touching Wooyoung and neither had a problem with them being affectionate in public. For the longest time, ever since he had gotten over his original phase of denial, Yeosang had wondered and pondered over those special feelings inside of his chest, couldn't name it if someone had asked him about it.

After their special christma's vlive where he had to vocalize  _ why _ he had sometimes ignored Wooyoung, he finally understood. 

He wasn’t jealous about them touching Wooyoung or him touching them; he was jealous of the fact that they could do it so openly. Touch him without thinking twice about it. Hugging, kissing his cheek, slap his ass- they could all do these innocent acts of affection and Yeosang? All he could do was wait and see if his best friend would initiate it first. 

Because Yeosang, openly affectionate on camera? Unlikely, at least not as much as the others were. He wasn’t one to usually go for hugs, who clings and tried to kiss the members. That just wasn't him.

But he wanted that. So bad.

Yeosang wanted to hug Wooyoung without the thought of his feelings getting noticed, to cling to his best friend and just be in his overall space- wherever and whenever. 

That's what he was jealous about. Unreasonable, but when was ever good with handling and dealing with his own feelings? Seonghwa would probably say never.

In their little christma's vlive it came up and he explained. Wooyoung, the good friend he is, forgave him when Seonghwa and Hongjoong explained Yeosang's part, and he was glad. When Yeosang had told him that it wasn't jealousy. The built up tension between them gone, dispersed as if it had never existed to begin with.

That Wooyoung pulled him into a bone crushing hug shouldn't have been so surprising to him but it still was. The hand on his cheek turning his head, both arms circling his back and patting it while Wooyoung presses their cheeks together. Yeosang didn't know how ro react, letting Wooyoung hug him, feeling the warmth radiating back from the younger. 

Yeosang had missed that. Missed the way their hugs felt- yet, it was over all too soon. And everything went their normal chaotic way. Only inside of Yeosang’s head was the feeling of their touches still present. 

But as always, Yeosang said nothing, keeping up his outer appearance.

He was just glad that their tension was finally resolved.

\-----

It had happened. And Yeosang didn't know what to do. At this point he knew about his feelings for half a year now, but being confronted like this? All those months hadn't prepared him for this.

Wooyoung had pulled him away from the other's after an ot8 vlive and practically shoved him into a wall. Surprised at the younger's roughness he yelps and holds up his hands in defense, not knowing what would happen in the next minutes. 

To his second surprise did Wooyoung neither look angry nor worried just-  _ happy?  _

_ Happy.  _

"I think you have to tell me something." 

Wooyoung's voice was light, soft like a breeze but filled with emotions strong enough to be a storm. And Yeosang was the landslide he was passing over. Everything in his head turned upside down, panic raising inside of his chest. How could Wooyoung-?

"What do you mean  _ tell you _ ?" Yeosang asked back, raising an eyebrow to mask his nervousness because this couldn’t happen.

"Exactly what I said. I know you have something to tell me and I want to hear it." Wooyoung's voice only wavered slightly, the happiness still very prominent. 

"I have nothing to tell you."

"You do."

"I don't."

"Yeosang-!"

"Wooyoung? " 

"Fuck, just tell me that you love me!" 

Yeosang deflates against the wall. Suddenly even the wall seemed to not support him anymore, his body shaking all of the sudden. Wooyoung knew about his feelings- he was aware of it. 

"What…?" He all but whispers, voice in no way stable anymore. 

"I know that you love me, Sangie, I know." 

Now Wooyo ung presses closer, crowds his space and Yeosang doesn’t know what to do, how to react. All he could think about was how Wooyoung could have potentially noticed. Yeosang had always tried to make his feelings unnoticeable yet Wooyoung was aware.  _ How?  _

"And?" He presses out, looking away. Looking at Wooyoung hurts and he is sure his face betrays his discomfort, that his best friend knows exactly how he feels.  _ In more than one way. _ “ What do you do now? Laugh about me?” 

Yeosang laug hs bitterly, fisting the fabric of his shirt. It didn’t matter that Wooyoung knew, it didn’t matter that he had been obvious enough to get  _ noticed. _ All that mattered in this moment was for Yeosang to hide his pained heart away and let the other see how v ulnerable he is. 

How right Wooyoung had been. 

“Laugh about you? Why would I-”

“Isn’t it obvious? I’m your best friend and we are in the same idol group. It must be disgusting to know that.” 

“What?” Wooyoung shrieked but Yeosang still can’t bring himself to look up, to face what he had been avoiding for months at this point. 

“I’m bisexual Wooyoung with a lean for men, doesn’t that weird you out, knowing we sleep in the same room?” 

A first tear slips past his eye. He has not enough willpower to whip it away so he let the stray tear fall. 

“Sangie, I’m gay? Why would that weird me out?” 

Two hands grasp his arms and shake him lightly, probably to earn his attention but Yeosang keeps his eyes glued to the ground, refusing to see the face he loved so much filled with mixed emotions. 

“So that’s why you are always all over San.” 

Yeosang mutters these words without thinking twice about it but feels immediately bad. Wooyoung’s hands slip from his arms and Yeosang is prepared to be yelled at, to get a lecture or just get a well-deserved beating. But he gains none of those. Instead Wooyoung's pain filled voice reaches his ears and it breaks Yeosang’s heart in a million pieces. 

“What are you saying, Yeosang? How can you say that?!” 

He is shoved hard into the wall, a pained whimper escaping his lips but he deserved that, Yeosang knew the words he had said were uncalled for. 

“Why?! Yeosang tell m e, what has San to do with this?!” 

“He is all over you, what do you expect me to think?!” 

Yeosang yells back at him, his eyes snapping up to look at Wooyoung but all he can see are blurred pictures and whips his eyes and cheeks feverishly, hating how he couldn’t stop the tears from rolling.

“Loving you brings me pain, Wooyoung! I can’t do this!” 

He turns, runs down a hallway, away from everyone and away from Wooyoung. 

\-----

Yeosang sits with his legs pressed against his chest, face buried deep into his knees and his long blond hair falls around his face, hiding him in the best way possible. Because how could he explain what happened? Why had he said things which should have left unsaid? 

Why had he been so dumb to  _ fall _ for his best friend? The light of his life?

He had no certain answer for that. After months and months of hurting, not knowing what to say or what to do, had Yeosang finally reached his breaking point. And the tears streaming down his face were an even stronger indicator for his true feelings. The emotions he had hid for so long, only for them to be torn down at the end. 

It felt bad, knowing that everything he had built up with Wooyoung in the past 6 years could crumble so easily just because he was a dumb lovestruck boy in a still very much homophobic country.

It couldn’t have come worse. Now he was stuck with crying and regretting, hoping Wooyoung wouldn’t come to their shared bedroom tonight because Yeosang would understand, he could understand it so well if it were Wooyoung’s decision to stay away. 

The room was dark, the light switch hadn’t been turned on when Yeosang had come home, only the door slamming shut was even an indicator that he was indeed home. Though he was fairly sure that the other members were already aware of his slip up. Yeosang had never hated himself more than that day. 

Yet, even in his sobbing, tear stained state couldn’t he stop longing for the only person who had made his heart skip the past years. To fall back into the easiness he had created with Wooyoung. The hugs and kisses, even if they meant nothing. To wake up with t angled bodies, breathes mixed and body heat shared as if it was nothing special for either of them. 

Yeosang had loved, desired, and wanted Wooyoung for so long even if it had been subconcoíously and now he was losing him completely. 

It was the greatest punishment. 

A knock on the door made Yeosang jerk violently, his sobbs immediately growing quiet even though he was sure the person on the other side of the door had most likely heard him anyway. He can guess through his guilt ridden mind that the person must be either Hongjoong or Seonghwa, one of them trying to knock some sense back into him while comforting him nonetheless.

He does not expect the person to open the door without Yeosang vocalizing his okay and neither does he expect to hear the key turn, a click indicating that he was now locked with whoever had come inside. Whoever was exposed to the crying mess Yeosang was, his shaking frame and the self-hatred oozing out of him. Can’t help himself when he hides even more into his own body, hoping that the person now sitting on the ground with him would leave him alone. To go away and let him wallow on the self-hatred he deserved. 

What he gets instead is a voice so close to breaking yet so familiar in tone and color that Yeosang can’t help himself, clawing his pants painfully strong, wet teardrops staining clothes and skin. 

“Sangie.” 

It’s the only thing Wooyoung says so close to him that Yeosang breaks again into thousand pieces, heart beating so erratically that he wishes it to stop completely, to free him from the humiliation and disgust he would receive, would inflict on himself. 

A hand is carefully placed on his arm and Yeosang shakes violently away, feeling the contact burn through his clothes directly on his skin, almost like an immediate scar. 

Yet, he can’t stop the words from falling out of his mouth, some incoherent, others said so strong Yeosang has no idea where he takes the strength from. Each and every word is followed by sob, a heavy breath, heavy shaking of his body. 

“I love you.” Yeosang’s voice breaks. He hears himself say those words he had wanted to say so many times to the man he loved, to the person he had ultimately fallen for. “So- so much. Wooyoung you have no idea-” 

Because Wooyoung had no idea, how could he possibly when Yeosang had never let the younger see so deep inside of his brain? 

He had wanted to shower Wooyoung in the love he deserved, in the attention he should get, the very best treatment a wonderful man like him should be exposed to. Yeosang had done none of that. Instead he had belittled their powerful friendship and was now hating himself for that. 

“Sangie-” 

Wooyoung tries again, arm reaching out again but Yeosang shakes him off, curling in on himself even more. Until two hands grip his arms merciless and he finds no way of escaping the younger man now. 

“Please listen to me Yeosangie. Let me say something- Can you grant me that?” 

Wooyoung’s voice is so incredibly hoarse it makes the tears flowing from his eyes even thicker, heart breaking loudly because he knows he is the reason for the literal sunshine boy to become so broken. 

“Can you listen to me just this once?” The younger one is shaking. “Just listen.”

And even though Yeosang thinks he doesn’t deserve to listen to Wooyoung after his slip up, at the words he had said, he does comply with Wooyoung's wish, biting his own lips to prevent a sound coming from him. For a moment there is only silence in their normally loud shared room, hearts beating so fast, blood rushing hurriedly through his ear. 

“Fuck, Yeosang do you even have an idea what your words made me realize?” Wooyoung scoots closer, Yeosang feels it when two arms wrapped around his curled figure. “Do you know what I finally saw after all those months? That our feelings are mutual, Yeosang! I came to you because I was so certain that you love me, that we share the same feelings! But a part of me was nervous, thinking I might have misinterpreted your signs all along. Can you understand what that means?!”

No, Yeosang can’t. How could he? His crush, no, his love harbouring the same feelings for Yeosang? Sounds like a fever dream coming true-

“Sangie, I’ve been in love with you for who knows how long, I just never noticed it until a certain point and then- I thought I was too late, that I had already lost you. That you had chosen to distance yourself from me because you overcame your feelings for me, that I wasn’t the one on your mind anymore. I was scared that the realization of my own feelings came too late.” 

He feels tear drops against his hair and only cries harder with the man he loves, not yet fully understanding the weight those words had but understanding nonetheless that Wooyoung was telling the truth. Could feel the honest truth dripping out of them like water slipping past your fingers. 

“Remember Wonderland promotions? I- it was the first time where I truly noticed what importance beside being my best friend you had in my life- yet I went to San and you noticed that, didn’t you? Yeosang, I was so scared of those feelings. It felt like running into a wall, not knowing what had happened to me, that I was suddenly seeing you in- in such a different light.” 

Yeosang couldn’t believe his ears, couldn’t possibly begin to grasp what Wooyoung was telling him- the younger had been in love with him at least since Wonderland? 

“During Answer I thought- I thought you weren’t in love with me anymore. And even before- you were so- so- so cold to me that I assumed it was your way of dealing with your feelings. I know it’s my fault that we kind of grew apart, especially after I started to hang onto San so much… I understand so well that it must have hurt you- seeing me all over another man. Because I feel like this too. Fuck, Yeosang, just the thought of someone else being your lover, your boyfriend or girlfriend, made me annoyed enough that Yunho kicked me out once when he was playing league with San! Because I couldn't stop whining, hoping we could become what I desired so much but was too afraid to chase after-!”

Wooyoung’s voice finally broke completely, the younger one becoming a sobbing mess on top of him, around him- inside of his heart. Yeosang could feel all the pent up frustration, desires and wants from the younger sipping into himself, experiencing partly what the other had gone through. Because, hadn’t he been the same? 

Yeosang had been running, hurting himself with denial and hiding, never sharing what was really on his mind. 

So he finally opens up his defence, letting Wooyoung fall into his open arms. A wet face presses itself into the crook of his neck, arms circling his body, clawing at his back in a desperate attempt to pull him even closer, Yeosang presses his cheek against Wooyoung’s hair, feeling the soft strands getting wet due to his own tears yet he can’t help but chase the feeling even more. 

“I’m sorry Wooyoungie, I’m so so sorry.” He hiccups, letting his own hands fall on Wooyoung’s back. 

“It’s okay- love you- love you so much Sangie.” Wooyoung’s breath ghosts over his shoulder when the younger talked, making him shiver, slowly understanding what had happened the last few hours- 

“Love you too-”

And if they sat there together for hours coming, none of the other members commented on it when they missed dinner and didn’t show up until the next day. They had at some point laid down in Wooyoung’s bed, the younger’s head on Yeosang’s chest because he wanted  _ to hear his heartbeat _ which was beating so quickly because of their close proximity. 

They wouldn’t tell the members about what they had talked about, not that it really mattered anyways, had they finally reached the same point. 

Because in the end, all that mattered was their love filling each other up, completing the half which had been missing prior, creating one love. 

Yeosang wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

And with Wooyoung at his side, he could overcome all his previous doubts and worries, knowing he wasn’t alone with those anymore. Because now, he had Wooyoung at his side. 

A man he was allowed to adore, to treasure and love, to be affectionate with and do things only lovers would do. All those things he had wished for such a long time finally fulfilled. 

In the end, his heart must have been crystal clear from the beginning, no matter what happened, Wooyoung was always aware of what was going on inside of his heart. It was always just a matter of actually talking about it. 

For now, he was content with Wooyoung in his arms and the members' support. 

\----

“Sangie.” 

A breathy voice calls for him and Yeosang can barely lift his head to look into the mirror ahead, seeing who had called him. Soft smile on his lips, he straightens his back, even though that alone was straining his exhausted muscles, locking eyes with his boyfriend. 

“Yeah?” Yeosang’s voice is rough from the third round of practicing their inception choreo, seeing how that has a visible effect on his boyfriends because Yeosang is sure the red on Wooyoung’s cheeks had just intensified a bit. 

It takes a moment before he regains his posture and the smirk he shows ever so often. Without hesitation does he come closer until Yeosang turns to him, now face to face and is once more reminded that he had the most beautiful boyfriend in the world- even after practicing a choreo for hours. 

“Your solo dance break is so hot.” Wooyoung whispers before he pulls Yeosang roughly into a kiss, letting his tongue slide in with ease. Yeosang almost chuckled at how easy this had become ever since their first heart to heart talk. 

For a moment he relishes in the feeling of Wooyoung so close, letting his hands rest on the younger’s hips until a whistle tears them apart, a smug San yelling from the other side of the practice room.

“Get a room you two!”

“We already have if you remember.” 

Yeosang yells back and both of them giggle at San’s gagging sounds. 

  
  
  


_ This is everything he had ever wanted.  _

**Author's Note:**

> I always enjoy some kind of feedback so:  
> Come say hi [Twitter](https://twitter.com/SolreyItIs) and my [ CC](https://curiouscat.me/@SolreyItIs)


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